Rocky Balboa

Rocky Balboa is a fitness icon, and one approach would be to dress in his boxing gear. But if you’ve already started bulking or if it’s freezing outside, you may want to opt for something along the lines of the sweatsuit Rocky wears in the iconic training montage from 1976’s Rocky. 

Assuming you have:

• Gray sweatpants
• A gray sweatshirt
• Worn-in Converse All-Stars
• A Navy beanie
• White tubesocks

You’ll need:

• Wrist wraps (optional)

John Matrix/Commando

Arnold Schwazenegger has been in plenty of movies, from thrilling action flicks like Terminator and Predator to comedies like Twins and Jingle All the Way. But one of Schwarzenegger’s most badass roles was undeniably John Matrix, a former Special Forces colonel out to take down a former dictator to save his daughter. Who could forget the moment when a deadpan Matrix “let Sully go“?

The most important aspect of this costume is also the cheapest: some black body paint for you face and torso. 

Assuming you have:

• Pants (preferably camo/cargo pants or khakis—but jeans work, too)
• Boots 
• Impressive biceps and a generally ripped upper body
• A passable Arnold impersonation 

You’ll need:

• Black body paint (to stripe across your face and body, $5 at Party City) 
• Bullet belt (optional, $10 at Party City)
• Fake weapon that’s very clearly not real (anything from a hunting knife to a rifle could work)

The Incredible Hulk

In his Incredible Hulkdays, Lou Ferrigno’s physique was nothing short of incredible. After all, he played our favorite green maniac in the late-’70s-early-’80s series, long before CGI could take Dr. Banner from man to monster. So if you’ve got the physique for it, this one’s as easy as can be, although it could get a little messy if you don’t get a little help.

Assuming you have:

• Jeans
• A flannel (optional)
• A hulking physique

You’ll need:

• Green body paint (maybe two tubes) ($5 each at Party City)
• If you really want to go all out, green hairspray ($4 at Party City)
• Giant, hilariously fluffy wig (optional)

The Old Spice Guy

While Terry Crews may have been the most jacked face of Old Spice ever, Isaiah Mustafa’s embodiment is a hilarious throwback that’s insanely easy to replicate:

You may not have all (or any) of the skills he boasts in the commercial, but you don’t need those. All you do need is a towel, some shorts, and Old Spice to make this one work. Bonus: You’ll smell great, no matter where the night takes you.

Assuming you have:

• A white towel (clean, please)
• Khaki shorts to wear underneath
• The chops to impersonate his TV-ready voice

You’ll need:

• Any Old Spice product, as cheap or expensive as you please (and, hey, you may already have that, too)

Works best at: beach parties.

John Cena

He’s gone through a few persona overhauls, but the one thing that’s never changed about the former Doctor of Thuganomics is his jean shorts. There’s a fair amount of customization here, and some optional accessories. The most important aspects are probably the jean shorts and the wrist bands.

Assuming you have:

• Some old—preferably oversized—jean shorts 
• A Basic Training-style buzz cut (or a hilarious wig, if you want to look like current Cena)
• Black knee pads (optional)

You’ll need:

• Wrist bands (either from Amazon or the WWE store) 
• Never Give Up hat (optional—but especially helpful if your hair isn’t Cena-esque—from the WWE web store)   ​

John Rambo

John Rambo is one of those action-movie badasses who seems to transcend time. Even those who have never seen the movie have a very clear idea of the gist of it. Sly Stallone‘s depiction of a gritty, troubled Vietnam veteran evading law enforcement launched the original film, First Blood, into a franchise. If your friends can’t guess this costume at first sight, that’s their problem. This one’s also super-customizable, since Stallone appeared both in a black, raw-cut muscle tank and shirtless. The important parts? The bandana, the bullet belt, and the absurdly chiseled upper body and/or jawline.

Assuming you have: 

• A worn-out, black, clearly DIYed tank top (or a t-shirt you can cut into one)
• Jeans 
• Ripped shoulders 

You’ll need:

• Red bandana ($3 at Party City—or, if you cut your own tank top, save some of the fabric and just use that for free)
• Fake weapon that’s very clearly not real (a hunting knife to a bow and arrow, to a rife could work)
• Bullet belt (optional, $10 at Party City)
• Some of that $5 body paint (or dirt, if you really want to go cheap) to give the effect of roughing it in the woods

Richard Simmons

This one is admittedly not badass, but it’s hilarious and directly related to fitness. Richard Simmons shot to fame for his weight-loss programs back in the day, and he’s still at it now. His signature brightly colored tank tops and short-shorts are easy enough to replicate, as long as you never skip legs day.

Assuming you have:

• A workout tank top (preferably a bright one, and preferably one with sparkles)
• Quads that you’re dying to show off
• White sneakers
• White crew socks

You’ll need:

• Short-shorts (whether they’re your girlfriend’s or something cheap from Amazon Prime)
• Huge wig (optional, but adds to the effect; $20 at Party City)
• Probably some energy drinks. It’s a long night, and you will be expected to embody Richard Simmons.

He-Man

Dolph Lundgren, another Hollywood badass who’s still keeping up with his fitness today, played He-Man in 1987’s Masters of the Universe. We can only imagine all the physique goals that were born that year. Just a little more serious and intimidating than the cartoon version of this comic-book hero, Lundgren’s He-Man is ripped out of his mind. If you are, too, show off those quads and that six-pack with this costume. This may be a bare-minimum He-Man, but we don’t have time for elaborate equipment, and that’s not our fault. Besides, the abs are more impressive anyway. (If you have a set of old football pads lying around that no one’s gonna miss, you can easily cut out the shoulders, spray-paint them gold, and tie them together to complete the look. Remember: It’s optional, but you have the power.)

Assuming you have: 

• An impressive chest and quads
• A neutral-colored Speedo, bodybuilding suit, or even some dark-colored briefs (yup, we’re really going for it)
• A few belts to layer over each other

You’ll need:

• Blonde wig (will probably run you about $20, but completes the costume)
• Fake sword (also important, but only $7 at Party City)
• Spartan shin guards ($15 on Amazon)

Lumberjack/The Brawny Man

More like lumber-jacked, right? This one may actually be the easiest costume ever, and you probably have everything you need already. And this is customizable, because if you don’t want to get a fake chainsaw or ax, you can just carry a roll of paper towels around with you (which, given most of the Halloween parties we’ve been to, may not be a bad idea). Boom: You’re instantly the Brawny Man instead of a plain ol’ lumberjack. 

Assuming you have:

• Jeans
• A flannel
• A knit beanie
• Gargantuan lumberjack-esque arms 

You’ll need:

• Fake ax for lumberjack ($4 at Party City). If you’re into scary costumes, a fake bloody chainsaw (like this $17 option from Party City) transforms you into a murderous lumberjack.
• Paper towels for Brawny Man (free from your kitchen, probably)

John McClane from ‘Die Hard’

Die Hard may just be one of the best Christmas movies of all time (because it’s totally a Christmas movie in our book, despite the absence of the Grinch or much holiday cheer). In the original, Bruce Willis takes on a slew of bad guys as NYPD cop John McClane, who has to take matters into his own hands to save his wife, one of their hostages. This is another one that you’ve probably got most of the supplies for. Yippee ki-yay, motherf*cker!

Assuming you have: 

• A white tank top you’re willing to rub dirt on
• A button-down (ideally one you’re also willing to rub dirt on)
• A formidable five o’clock shadow
• Jeans or khakis
• A built chest

You’ll need:

• If you don’t want to rub dirt on your face and shirt, some $5 body paint
• Some of your girlfriend’s lipliner and a butterfly closures for a fake head wound (about $5 from any drug store)
• Fake police badge ($4 at Party City)

Tarzan

There have been countless depictions of this jungle hero, but our personal favorite might be former cover starAlexander Skarsgard‘s. His physique is impressive, and his costume may be the easiest (and most full-coverage, for any of you legs-day skippers).

Assuming you have:

• Khakis you are prepared to sacrifice
• Shredded abs and a poundable chest

You’ll need:

• Some $5 body paint to act as fake dirt
• A wig (optional—your own messy hair will work just fine)
• A loincloth (if you want to really go for it, $25 at Walmart)

Zeus

Since Zeus is literally a Greek god, you’ve got to have the physique to back this one up. If not, you can just tell people you’re masquerading as a frat boy at a toga party. This one’s pretty straightforward, and can really be tailored to any Greek or Roman deity of your choice, depending on your accessories. Take Poseidon/Neptune, for example: Add a trident, and you’re suddenly the king of the ocean. The most important accessories, if the statue we’re referencing is any indication, are some killer obliques.

Assuming you have:

• A white bedsheet
• Flip-flops
• Washboard abs

You’ll need:

• A gray or white fake beard ($5 at Party City)
• A trident for Neptune ($5 at Party City)